Mummy ornament cries in stolen baby ornament shocker!

Breaking news, Hereford, ornaments have feelings!

“Staff at Hereford Gas Services in Mortimer Road were shocked to find a penguin ornament they’d bought to decorate their newly furnished showroom was missing after just a week,” said the Hereford Times.

“Jo Laurie, who has worked at the company for 13 years, said: ‘We are angry because it could have been worth a lot more. It is still shoplifting.

“‘The mummy is lost without her baby. Whoever has it, we’re asking to please leave it outside on our doorstep.'”

Someone please tell Jo Laurie that ornaments don’t miss other ornaments, they’re only objects not actual living things!

What’s that? Oh, more news just in: car in Merton Meadow breaks down in tears after neighbouring best mate always car is driven off by owner for the weekend. Counsellors are at the scene.

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